Suhaib Hasan

Raising Children in Islam Suhaib Hasan

This book is based not only on years of specialised study in this field but also reflects my own personal experiences in a family filled with children over 30 years of married life. I was brought up in a conservative and deeply religious family in the Indian subcontinent. I had my own turbulent experiences of helping my wife raise our own six children, initially in a simple Asian/African community in Kenya, and later in the complex multicultural environment of Britain. Through the progress of my progeny from school to university, I learned of the British educational system, from the egalitarian approach of modern comprehensive schools, an idealistic concept often defeated by lack of funding, to the elitist and successful private sector which insists on rigorous discipline, tradition and high academic achievement. Life in Britain opens the door to a myriad of contrasts in value systems, customs, races and beliefs. The Muslim discovers that his Islamic values and faith are not only alien to the dominant western culture throughout the society, but that the two insist on locking horns in battle. This struggle of two opposing yet equally dogmatic belief systems engulfs and threatens to drown the Muslims. Some fortunate ones swim through the ocean of parenthood with smiling faces, having successfully negotiated the obstacles thrown their way. They smile because not only have they survived the test with their own faith and values intact, but have also succeeded in transmitting their beliefs and norms to their children. Imagine the content and sense of achievement parents must feel when observing their adult children who too share the same love and devotion to the Mosque, the Quran and the many Islamic precepts. In a world obsessed with materialism and denial of God, this is truly a great achievement. Unhappily there are many more parents who flounder and sink, who do not share this sense of achievement and jubilation, and who weep with sorrow and failure when observing their own offspring: aged parents confronted with the dreadful spectacle of their indecently dressed daughter going to the pub with her arms around her current boyfriend, or their beloved son who buys the attentions of street women and even fathers illegitimate children. These parents feel as if the earth is dropping from under their feet and they are being swallowed by quicksand, powerless and helpless. They wish they could have a second chance at raising their children but there is never a second chance. This small booklet is presented to those young men and women beginning the long journey of parenthood, in the hope that they may never shed the tears of the defeated.