K E Leger

Denial and Isolation of Self K E Leger

The Denial and Isolation of Self: Guiding Self Straight into the Hands of Silent Abuse-I only wrote one poem before 1994. I mainly was a diary girl up until my junior year in high school. That was the year I began my first novel. So, that kept me really busy. After 1994 and on, I started writing my feelings in rhyme. I have no idea what compelled me to do so, but looking back now, the reason is clear: This book, as well as, the ones that shall follow it. The Denial and Isolation of Self paints the picture of a woman's life as a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, a student, and a teacher. As you slowly weave your way through the works in this book, you'll start to see the change in my personality and in the marriage. You see my joys raising my children. You also see my struggles trying to juggle motherhood, being a wife and all that entails, dealing with family and people, and starting a career all the while dealing with this lurking thing that stood in the way of my happiness. The last year included in this book, 2011, was my hardest struggle trying to keep everything together. This particular year was the final straw leading to the darkest period of my life. From 2008 to 2011, you will see how I denied my self by burying myself in anything other than the reality that faced me, which I later learned was Silent Abuse! A term I had never heard of during this period of my life, nor would I have ever dreamed that such a thing would ever happen to me. According to Julie Axelrod, in her article titled "The 5 Stages of Loss and Grief," which I refer back to time and time again throughout the writing of these books, the denying of oneself.......is a normal reaction to rationalize overwhelming emotions.... Axelrod refers to it as a defense mechanism we use to block out the words and hide from the facts of what is actually happening to us. This is my first stage in the five stages of loss and grief... Denial and Isolation.