Ernest Arlington Twain

Washertown: an American Masterpiece! Ernest Arlington Twain

WASHERTOWN: AN AMERICAN MASTERPIECE! is a book of humor-a fun and funny book. It is a story that is frequently a little bit "off center" (sometimes in both style as well as content), an autobiography of sorts that is at times rather "warped" or "twisted" (as perhaps is its author), and a book that is occasionally just plain irreverent. However, it is always entertaining. It lets you laugh (sometimes out loud); but it also allows you to learn things (and sometimes even wipe away a tear or two). In other words, WASHERTOWN is about life, yours as well as mine, and should lead therefore to your own "remembrance of things past"-mostly good stuff I hope. The events that WASHERTOWN presents really happened to me (or maybe I should say because of me). And the people and the places are real. Each "story" actually unfolded pretty much the way it is described. There may be some exaggeration or embellishment here and there, meaning for example that my kindygarden teacher (I always preferred that spelling) might not have been quite as mean as I say she was, and my first real love affair, which took place in second grade (really), may not have been quite as passionate as I like to think it was. And, to give you one more example, the YMCA camp counselor who talked to my buddies and me ("almost sixth graders") about sex (i.e. about "playing" with ourselves too much and "doing" bad things to girls) probably wasn't as "out of it" as I make him appear to be. Or maybe he was. Whatever. Just remember that what you will read about in WASHERTOWN really and truly happened. And by the way, when you get to the part about fourth grade, I want you to know that the teacher really was beautiful (just as beautiful as I say she is), and that I really was in love with her (for the whole year at least), and that I really did buy her a bottle of "Evening in Paris" perfume one Christmas a long time ago (although I found out later that she actually wore "White Shoulders"). I guess you can't win them al